1755
Chatham
download as Word file [Win7 docx]
download as pdf
Memorandum
20th January 1755
I came to a determination, to begin keeping a regular Diary (as God shall enable me) of the state and daily frame of my soul, and the gracious dealings of God unto me. The advice and experience of others who have left upon record, the benefit they have found by this practice, has long made me desirous to imitate them, but something from within or without has still hindered. Lord accept me, and prevent my resting upon any forms, or finding any satisfaction in them, farther than as they lead to Thee. Amen.
As Merchants begin their books with an inventory of stock, so would I in a brief manner set down my present state for my future government. I trust that the Lord has caused more of his goodness to pass before me this year, than I ever before experienced. I hope particularly he has taken me more off my own bottom, and given me to see more of the necessity and the sufficiency of the Lord Jesus Christ in his office of Saviour of his people – and has made me more willing to depend upon his righteousness only. I trust He has enabled me, to see more clearly the truth and comfort of those peculiar doctrines of the glorious gospel, which in these days are by many either denied, or explained away. I have been led too of late into better opportunities than I formerly had, particularly in my acquaintance, which I have contracted with several experienced Christians, whose belief and hopes are a confirmation of my own, convincing me that though there is a diversity of operations, it is the same Spirit that worketh in all. On the other side I labour under weakness, I am wearied with a body of sin and death, often when I would do good evil is present with me; my affections are cold and wavering, my faith weak and interrupted. Thus I find my life to be a continual warfare. But blessed be God for the hopes of final victory over sin and corruption, through Jesus Christ our Lord, by whom I hope I can in a low degree say, the world is crucified to me, and I unto the world.
In temporals I have to praise God for health, sufficiency, peace, content; from his goodness all I have proceeds and his grace has taught me to say, It is enough; I mean for the present, and I desire to trust him for the future: for He has said I will never leave thee nor forsake thee. [1]
Monday 20 January 1755
R a [Rose at] 7. Private [devotions] till 8. Frame not altogether cold, was led to pray for more knowledge in the mystery of godliness in the person of Christ, according to what I have read of late in Dr Owen’s Christo[Christologia] [2] – in the forenoon an hour in p[prayer], and read, Scripture with [my dear Polly]; then walked to Dock [3] and Brumpton [4], saw Mr D, conversed with Mr Mc[?] chiefly about the freedom of grace and charity due to fellow Xans[Christians]. PM wrote Mr Brewer [5] – invitation down – etc.
Tuesday 21 January
AM: overslept, dull frame. I know not if the heaviness of the weather affected me, found myself cold, languid and trifling all day, stayed within doors on account of rain, reading various, amongst others a journal and defence of Mr Wly[Wesley]; know not what to say of his account of the manner in which so many of his hearers were awakened, only that I never met with any instance of the kind I could depend on; yet there seems to be a spirit of sincerity and gospel zeal for gospel truths in his writing, and be the errors of him or his followers what they will, I believe God has been pleased to make him an instrument of good. Lord carry on and increase thy work in thy own way, and teach me to honour a principle of grace wherever I find it, though mixed as it must more or less be with human weakness.
Wednesday 22nd January
Still very cold, barren and wandering in all my duties, but blessed be God in some measure enabled to plead that better righteousness than my own, which is provided for poor sinners. Walked in the fields in hopes of finding an enlargement, but instead thereof got into a fruitless scheming set of thoughts. I find the world still too much in my heart, but I hope am desirous to be raised above it. O that my failings might at least teach me humility, and convince me more effectually how frail I am. Passed the evening with the freemasons, a fellow-crafts lodge [6] – p[prayer] etc; with [my dear Polly] 2.[?] but sadly contracted. Nothing particular in my reading, but hope I desire to trust in that Divine Providence which led Jacob from his father’s house and increased him to two bands; surely my experiences hitherto have not been less wonderful, and worthy acknowledgement than his. Praise the L[Lord] O my soul.
Saturday 25 January
These three days past, have not found much alteration - if any, I hope not for the worse. Walking in the fields Thursday and yesterday was something stirred up to praise my Gracious God for all his blessings, and to lament my coldness. Have found a little enlargement in my morning exercises, and upon the whole I hope that though I cannot get rid of my corruptions, I am sincerely desirous to strive against them, and to be humbled under them. Some letters I have met with of Mr Wfd[Whitefield] and others, have led me to adore the free grace of God in them, and while my heart was warm, I humbly submitted myself to the guidance of the same Spirit. Though I have no cause to subscribe myself their followers, yet I cannot but admire and respect many of them for I know not where I have found such expressions of love to God, and man, such marks of humility and zeal for the glory of the gospel, as amongst them. Purchased the lives of two noted servants of God deceased (Jos Allen [Joseph Alleine] and T[Thomas] Halyburton). [7] Lord grant I may be profited by their experience, and animated by their example. This morning received a letter from my friend Mr M[Manesty] [8] relating (amongst other things) to a settlement. When I came home, retired and laid the business before the Lord, requesting that he would be pleased to direct me in this and all other concerns, to what may be most for his glory and my own good. I pleaded for this from his gracious promise Proverbs 3 verses 5,6 [9]. The thing mentioned will I think be suitable enough; if it is, I know his goodness can remove every obstacle – and blessed be his holy name, He inclines my hard unbelieving heart to depend upon Him.
Mem[Memo]: Upon several occasions, I have lately been surprised into great warmth[anger] in argument, and a hasty way of speaking quite unsuitable to my better judgment. Lord forgive my pride, which occasions it and give me the wisdom, from above, gentle and easy to be entreated. Set apart the evening to review the circumstances of the week past, to confess and to praise accordingly, and to prepare my mind for the approaching Sabbath. Lord do thou work in me and for me.
Sunday 26 January
Much heaviness and worldly thoughts through the whole of the day, and engaged in trifling vain discourse, by an old acquaintance paying me a visit which I could not put off, and absent myself from. Was at church and chapel [10], Mr F[Frank] [11] preached both times: the first from Leviticus 19:17, the second from Psalm 119 verse 67. Poor general discourses, yet I may take a word of admonition, especially with regard to the duty of reproof: many calls of this kind passed unimproved for want of zeal and prudence. As to the advantage of afflictions, I can set my seal to it from experience. In the evening heard one Gregory at the Methodist meeting upon John 3:15. A sound warm discourse, and I hope my heart was something affected. When he showed how far a profane and carnal person may attain in the profession of the belief of the gospel without a change of heart, and directed us to examine our own hearts if we could offer nothing farther, I trust the Lord witnessed to my conscience, that he had done more for me, that mine though very weak was a living faith, and proceeded from such principles, and in its measure produced such fruits as he after described. Blessed be God for grace, free grace, enlightening, strengthening, sanctifying, pardoning and evidencing grace. Lord the work is thine, thine be the praise. In his prayer he made a pathetic confession of our national sins, owing to deprecating the Lord’s judgements; in this my heart was led to join. Surely as a people we have done very wickedly, and sinned against the richest dispensations and most wonderful deliverances; again and again the Lord has been entreated for us, when He was seemingly just striking; yet we have provoked him with evil anew. Lord spare us even yet, and bless us in turning us from our iniquities; and give me a zeal for thy glory, and compassion for the souls of careless offenders, that I may mourn before Thee for what I cannot prevent. Wrote B[Brother] Clunie. Concluded the day in p[prayer] as usual, a little more enlarged than I have been in an evening of late. Strong reports of an expected war, hurry of armaments by sea and land [12]. I praise the Lord I find his Holy Name to be a strong tower, and a sure hiding place. The Lord reigneth, let the people be never so unquiet.
Monday 27 January
Nothing very remarkable today. Hope I found some warmth and reality in my devotional exercises – adored be grace for it; that can work upon so fallen helpless creature. Scr Less [Scripture lesson]: Genesis ad fin [to the end] and John 18:19,20. O may I imitate Joseph, but more especially the Lord Jesus if ever called to suffer for righteousness sake, and leave it to him who knows my case, to take care of it. Read a good deal of Mr H_n[Halyburton’s] account of his experience, from which I desire to learn more of the deceitfulness of the human heart, and more of God’s wonderful working. Wrote to Mr M[Manesty] concerning his of the 25th; afterwards retired into the fields and recommended the event to the Lord who has commanded me to cast my care upon him, and this I endeavoured to do likewise in the morning. Lord forgive the faults, follies and trifling behaviour of this day, for my surety’s sake. Amen.
Tuesday 28th January
In the forenoon walked in the fields; had a pleasant comfortable time, was led into a farther and more particular surrender of myself to Divine Providence - especially in a view which for some time past, has been a good deal on my mind, though at present I see no opening that way. If it is the L’s[Lord’s] will he can find means, and in that case I profess myself ready. Mr H[Halyburton’s] experience I hope will be of use to me. O the deceitfulness of sin, but blessed be God through the Lord Christ - grace has much more abounded, though circumstances differ, the same work is carried on in all his children; the exalting God and debasing the creature – is the constant effect. I trust I can set my seal to this way. SL [Scripture Lesson] Genesis 45,46,47; Matthew 25. O why was I not one of those to whom the door is shut? R d [Read] more of Dr O[Owen’s] Xlogia[Christologia] [13], a rich book but the style something obscure; Lord enable me to understand more and more of that mystery.
Footnotes
[apologies the software does not easily allow for return to your place after reading the footnote - look for the coloured footnote no. in the main text]
1. Hebrews 13:5
2. John Owen, Christologia, or a Declaration of the glorious Mystery of the Person of Christ--God and Man: with the infinite Wisdom, Love, and Power of God in the Contrivance and Constitution thereof; as also, of the Grounds and Reasons of His Incarnation; the Nature of His Ministry in Heaven; the Present State of the Church above thereon; and the Use of His Person in Religion: with an Account and Vindication of the Honour, Worship, Faith, Love, and Obedience due unto Him, in and from the Church, 1677
3. Chatham Dockyard: “By the mid-18th Century the Royal Yards had developed into the largest industrial organisations in the world with complex facilities supporting thousands of skilled workers in a wide number of trades.” http://www.thedockyard.co.uk/The_Dockyards_History/Royal_Dockyards/royal_dockyards.html and http://www.chathamworldheritage.co.uk
4. Brompton, a village overlooking the Dockyard
5. Samuel Brewer [1724-1796], Pastor of Stepney Independent Meeting, the church attended by Captain Alexander Clunie who first introduced Newton to Brewer. Newton and Brewer where roughly the same age. Brewer was a mentor to Newton in his early Christian life. As did all the ladies of Stepney Independent, Polly [Mary Newton] took a shine to “dear Mr Brewer”. Newton would probably have begged Brewer to come and preach in Chatham.
6. Possibly the Royal Kent Lodge of Antiquity No. 20, founded in London in 1723 at the Anchor, Dutchy Lane, Strand, moved to the Queen's Head, Red Cat Lane, Chatham in 1748 and the Bunch of Grapes in 1751
7. Theodosia Alleine, The Life and death of Mr Joseph Alleine, 1672 and An extract of the life and death of Mr Thomas Halyburton, e.g ed. John Wesley, 1747 (2nd edition)
8. Joseph Manesty of Liverpool [d.1771], who had assumed a fatherly role in Newton’s life since the death of his friend Captain Newton Senior
9. Proverbs 3:5,6 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
10. Probably St Bartholomew’s Chapel, a very short distance from the Catlett’s home, part of St Bartholomew’s Hospital, Rochester, founded by in the 12th century by Gundulp, Bishop of Rochester. The chapel virtually marks the boundary between Chatham and Rochester. It was renovated by Sir Giles Gilbert Scott, descendant of Thomas Scott who was converted through Newton’s ministry.
11. Walter Frank [1727-1784] was the perpetual curate of Chatham from 1748. He was also a minor canon of Rochester Cathedral.
12. France and Britain were preparing for war over border disputes in their North American territories. The day after negotiations in London with the French diplomat Mirepoix failed, a proclamation was issued (on 23 January 1755) “encouraging” seamen to volunteer to serve on his Majesty’s ships of war by offering them bounty-money. Those not moved to feel “encouraged” were press-ganged into service. 200 Greenwich Hospital pensioners volunteered for the fleet. Chatham Dockyard alone was commissioning fifteen sailing ships. Even those returning home from long sea voyages were not exempt from being placed under severe pressure from the Navy. The Universal Magazine reported on 30 January 1755 that “His Majesty’s yachts are cruising in the channel, to pick out able-bodied seamen out of the homeward-bound vessels”.
13. John Owen, Christologia…, 1677 [cf footnote 2 for 20 January 1755]
Transcribed from Newton’s diary: Princeton University, John Newton Diary, CO199
images by kind permission Princeton Univeristy
|
